Soul-Weary-March 13, 2007

It amazes me how quickly we can become accustomed to the nice weather.

It can take all winter to get used the biting cold and by that time we are sick and tired of scrapping our windshields. But given one or maybe two nice warm days and we are in paradise.

Have you ever experienced burn out? Have you ever gotten to a point where deciding whether to have instant oatmeal or Cheerios for breakfast causes stress?

I am in one of those places right now. In fact, in my whole life I have never been this crispy. It is a tough place to be, one that I like to call "soul-weary". It is a deep dark place where the tiniest of daily decisions are stressful. Things that I would normally not even think about become difficult life and death struggles to come up with an answer. Soul-Weary.

As I have been analyzing my situation I have discovered that it all comes down to a combination of things.

1. Spiritual indifference. When I start to drift from God things start to become a bit darker;
2. Diet. When I intake too much caffeine it causes me to get grumpy and it sends me into orbit to a point where I can't focus for long, too hyper. I just can't sit still for a minute. Being one who enjoys thinking (I know it sounds weird but it is true!) it is hard not being able to focus for too long;
3. Laziness. Yes, this fits in with my blog title. I get lazy. This can come in many forms such as "I just don't FEEL like it today." "I will do it tomorrow...", etc.

 

In any case it has culminated in a deep black funk.

I am not through this yet but I have turned it over to God in prayer and He has shown me that He is still with me and will not forsake me, ever, for any reason.

I have peace deep inside.

In fact, I believe God is teaching me something and, in a sense, I am excited about this whole situation and He has caused me to praise Him-as I should do in all situations anyway!

I am of the firm belief that God wants me to evaluate my current ministries and maybe step out of some or all of them. I would covet your prayers for wisdom in this situation. What this is all leading to is a reevaluation of my giftedness and God's call on my life. I have some budding ideas that I believe God is putting into my heart and mind but I am not prepared to speak about them yet.

Well, that does it for me today. I hope you all have a great day today and remember to take your burdens to the Lord because He does care for you and what is happening in your life!